I went to church with my Christian friends some time ago.
I’m not Christian.
They asked me if I wanted to go. I would have said no, but, they are my friends and I am very religiously tolerant, so I said “yes”.
So I went, sat in the pews, donated tithes, and listened to the pastor.
I haven’t been to church in so long, but, coming back, it made me realize why I stopped going to church in the first place. Please keep in mind that I am only speaking for African American Baptist churches in down South Georgia.
Reasons why I quit church
1. It does absolutely nothing for me spiritually. It is boring. No, I’m not afraid to admit that. I used to be until I realized it’s a sin to lie.
2. It is possible to be a completely moral person without ever even attending church and it is possible to grow a relationship with God outside of church, which then defeats the whole purpose of even going to church in the first place. “Church” is merely a man- made building, with singing, and a man standing up front talking. Nothing more.
3. I’m sick of the people who (supposedly) get “touched by the Holy Ghost”. You got touched? Fine. Sit the hell down. That doesn’t mean run up and down the pews, flailing your arms around, smacking everyone in sight like the attention whore you really are. Once a lady got “touched by the spirit” and fainted… with her baby in her arms. People next to her had to catch her child. Wow.
4. More than becoming closer to God, it’s more like a competition. The longer you stand, the more “Christ-like” you are. The louder you sing, the more “Christ-like” you are. And if you don’t? You’re looked down upon. FYI, everyone worships in their own way. Your way may not be fitting for someone else.
5. No, making a 3 hour long sermon and stretching it by repeating the same words over and over and over again does not make you more “Christ-like”. It just makes you fake. I’m sure God heard you the first time.
6. I don’t like cults. Sorry. But that’s what most Christian churches seem like to me.
7. And, no, yelling out “Hallelujah!” and “praise Jesus!” every damn two seconds does not bring you closer to God. It’s just annoying.
8. Instead of preaching love and tolerance, and speaking about life related issues that the members can use to turn their life around, the pastor seems to always focus more on damning and converting “non-believers” and continuously warning their congregation about the Rapture and trying to control them with fear. I came to church to learn, not to hear a hate speech.
9. The church is usually always only filled with black women. Fat, old black women. With kids and no husband. Depressing. The only men out of the entire church are the people who hold leadership positions. Women fill the pews, yet only men are allowed to hold leadership positions. Odd.
10. Fake people. I can’t stand fake people. All they do is gossip, then smile in your face giving you that repeatitive “how are you doing?” talk when, really, they don’t care. Have you ever ran into a church member after church? Scary. They rock out to Lil’ Wayne and cuss out anyone in a second Monday- Saturday, but, on Sunday, they listen to Kirk Franklin and are usually the first to judge someone else for their poor actions. You can’t live however you want Monday- Saturday, then repent on Sunday and act as if you’re in the clear zone every damn week. What is the point of going to church if you aren’t going to apply the sermon to your own life? If you’re trying, I understand. We all make mistakes, but don’t judge and put down others when you’re doing the exact same thing.
11. Is it really necessary to sing 10 songs back to back then have a 3 hour long sermon? 10 songs? 3 hour sermon? Really? Come on.
12. Usually when the pastor says “Ok, folks, I’m almost done. We’re about to wrap this up” he doesn’t really mean this. It’s your que to know he’s going to preach for another hour.
13. You stand for the same amount of time as you sit.
14. I’ve been to a lot of black churches, and the pastor spoke in that same annoying tone of voice were they have to take a deep breath after everything they say at every single church. How about some originality?
This may seem crude, but I think God closes his ears every Sunday to prevent himself from being annoyed.